Anonymous said: i don't want to be sad anymore either, and i was wondering if you may share your tips on self-care and how you're attempting to get out of your rut? i feel coming from another person who was once stuck feeling down is better than hearing it from someone who is always feeling good and stuff.
thank you for your question! i’ve been trying to work hard on self care lately. I feel like its sort of bullshit when people don’t actively work on their happiness, especially when they are feeling down. i know it can be tough, but its always worth the hard work and i hope i can be of some help. i feel like sometimes i sound a bit hard when it comes to depression, i just think you need to be tough with it or it swallows you whole.
1. cook and clean - i find even when i am feeling completely dumb and like everything is out of control, the small satisfaction of having a tidy room or cooking a nice meal is enough to spark me up enough to do something bigger
2. Learn what you love - i fkn love ghibli movies. i swear i must have watched spirited away a thousand times, because i know i love it, and i will always love it, and watching it will always make me feel better about whatever dumb shit is bothering me. Know what makes you happy and actively surround yourself with that.
3. nature foo’! - leaves and breezes and sticks and bees are really great, and even if your heart is a storm and your brain is on fire, if you spend enough time with your back to the earth and your fingers in the dirt then you will feel better no matter what.
4.BE PRESENT! even if your freaking out, take a moment to feel your pulse and your skeleton and hair move in the wind, and your cosmic address. at the very least it will break that cycle of negativity thats going through your head (my physiologist taught me a more professional version of this)
5. run a bath and lay in it for way too long with so many candles you may as well have the light on and listen to Beyonce and think about what she would do. Also its okay if sometimes when you look at yourself in the mirror you whisper “flawless” to yourself
6. learn to be defiant - don’t ever be content with dissatisfaction. if someone tells you you are something they want you to be or that theres anything wrong with you, sock them in the guts and spit in their face. go down fighting, don’t ever give up unless you can say you absolutely tried your hardest.
7. Be coherent - sometimes i write letters and just burn them in the front yard. because at least it means i was able to cohesively put my feelings into words, and sometimes that is enough. almost every sad girl picture i’ve drawn for the past year has been about the same person and they have no idea. sometimes its more important to confess something to yourself.
8. don’t hang out with shitheads - if you don’t like someone don’t pretend to, and don’t allow yourself to be around people that you don’t love. be alone if you have to. its better to enjoy your own company then suffer a fools. Just because someone has been your friend before doesn’t mean they deserve to be now, its not a club that people get a life long membership to.
9. be gentle with yourself.
10. sleep - sleep like, over ten hours a day if you can. sleep so much that you’re spending more time in bed then you are out of bed. but also sometimes wake up early and do stuff, but sleep when your feeling weak.
11. pay someone to listen to your problems - the freedom of expression you will have telling someone who you are giving money to listen to your every moan and whim will be far greater then the restrained and censored version you give your friends. phsycologists don’t judge, and they have to listen to you, unlike your friends who choose to listen to you. i find paying someone to hear my problems once is far more helpful then recycling the same story a thousand times for each of my pals, who probably aren’t that interested anyway (this isn’t a comment on my friends who are all very supportive obviously)
12. respect your struggle - theres no use in feeling crappy about feeling crappy
13. eat whatever you want, whenever you want, and don’t feel bad about it, and don’t think about it at all. love yourself and none of that stuff matters anyway. take nude photos of yourself and don’t show anyone, take photos of yourself pulling the worst face you can and laugh at them. take photos of the inside of your mouth and the inside of your nose.
14. when i’m really sad i watch every episode of buffy and it has never failed to restart my life. not because its THAT good, maybe just as a form of meditation.
15. learn to accept compliments. don’t put yourself done. whenever someone gives me a compliment i reply “i try”, because i do.
16. pay your bills and your debts. don’t have that worry looming over your head if it doesn’t have to be. so often i will find myself feeling good, just to be reminded of some small worry in the back of my head that is forever looming.
i cant think of anymore!